Idk, you tell me.

A short list of things I feel contractually obligated to care about, but do not, even remotely: the Apple Watch, Meerkat, stupid tourists, people covered in honey, Apple, watches, things that combine apples and watches, jokes about apples and watches, the new Macbook, 12-year-old Ryan Gosling, companies named after fruit ... the entire tech hype cycle today, basically. HOLD UP, the Apple Watch has Tamagotchi? Where the heck can I get one of those things?!

1. The age of the never-ending Internet chat. Whenever something even remotely awkward happens to me, I compulsively click into Gchat or text to complain to somebody. Here's the thing: That relentless chatting is maybe preventing us from engaging with introspection/anxiety. Which could be good! Idk, you tell me.

2. The man who made Obama a meme. Very few established journalists have interviewed Obama. But he's sat down with Buzzfeed, three YouTube stars, and "Funny Or Die." Like it or hate it, you can blame this guy.

3. Carles is gone, but he's not dead, bbs! I could not be more excited to see the Internet's preeminent hipster penning an ironic and uncomfortably spot-on column about online media things. "After ​​the rise and fall of my content farm, ​HIPSTER RUNOFF, I’m back to generating text-based internet content, or what people who have never generated content call it, 'writing.'"

Hoo the hell is sewing brimmed hats for owls? (I'll show myself out, plz don't leave.)
Pocketable: An ode to a non-trendy, non-Apple phone. FINALLY. (3492 words/14 minutes)

Postscripts: Google Feud. Tinderella. Cyberpsychology. How self-publishing helps women and how many furries live near me. A history of brunch. A website that deletes itself. A dinner date with a supercomputer and a guide to Internet hell. Pop quiz!! Which of these (p. surprising) foods taste the same? Did a computer write this? What's your Internet age? In parting, here's an Apple Watch thing you should kinda maybe read. But I hate the Apple Watch, so ... don't trust me.

Until tomorrow!
@caitlindewey

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