Seriously the best. (Read: worst.)

Do u no what I'm dOiNg right now!!? :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

A: Internetting LIKE A LADY. Because women on the Internet, it turns out, tend to write v. expressively. We pioneered emoticons; we invented the altcap; we (and only we!) are the creators of "Netspeak." It's not "emotiveness" or "bad English," haters. It's *~cReAtIvItY.~*

1. How the Internet saved Esperanto. Esperanto, a language invented in 1887, was supposed to unite the world. If that sounds familiar, it should! The same could probably be said of the Internet, where the language is seeing a sudden surge.

2. Here's a fun mindfuck for your Friday: Technologists think we may soon be able to upload our brains to our machines. But do you want to live forever, conscious and disembodied?

3. The sex therapists of Silicon Valley. Because apparently, "tech workers are more vulnerable to issues around love and intimacy." (Someone pitch this to reality TV...)

HANDS OFF HUMAN

(AKA "the glorious return of Friday Dory GIFs")

Pocketable: If you don't speak English, Chinese or Spanish, good luck using the Internet. (2491 words/10 minutes)

Postscripts: Cat libraries. Troll factories. Pizzas on pizzas, absolutely! Why Swiss cheese has holes and what makes Pandora racist. Gamergate is awful and the House will investigate it. TED takes on abortion; comic takes on Grumpy Cat. Are you a slut who's also interested in telling charts and graphs? Last but not least, the best hate read since "300 Sandwiches." Seriously the best. (Read: worst.) Do not sleep on it.

Enjoy the weekend! See ya Monday,
@caitlindewey

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