The seven circles of hell
This week: drama queens, skinny jeans, Clubhouse, stolen muffins, stolen pups and the Zoom evolution of sign language
I read several good, dissenting takes on Clubhouse this week, unsure which to side with. On one hand: “I emerged from the car with the feeling that I had just experienced something special.” On the other: “The biotech sphere isn’t Clubhouse’s only arena of Theranos-level bullshit.”
All the while, I knew, a Clubhouse invitation sat ignored in my texts, a gift from my dear friend Olivia. Fine, I figured: I held out for a bit. Let us finally do away with this sneering, Luddite, late-stage-millennial procrastination and sign up for what Ryan Broderick recently and hilariously called “the conference call app.” (He’s not wrong.)
I won’t bore you by recounting my experience on Clubhouse; there seems to be this emergent microgenre of tech reporting in which the writer leads us, Virgo-like, through the seven circles of Clubhouse hell. But I will say that it reminded me almost immediately of my experience on a large university campus, which was on its face overrun by fraternities and football players and WASPy up-talkers from Westchester. At the same time, it was also big enough, and random enough, that you could find little pockets where you fit better.
Anyway — I have five Clubhouse invites now, and I will gladly give them out to anyone who demonstrates they have clicked through every link in our ✨BRAND NEW✨ classified section. Seriously, these people are paying for both my takeout and my wine tab this week, please show them some love, I appreciate them.
P.S. Did you substantially change the way you cook in the past year? Or know someone who did? Reply to this email — I’m interested in talking to you for a v. fun upcoming story on pandemic cooking trends.
If you read anything this weekend
“Confessions of a 32-Year-Old Drama Queen,” by Rebecca Jennings in Vulture. It’s hard to adequately describe this profile of YouTube star/antihero Trisha Paytas. Imagine the wildest shit you’ve ever seen on reality TV, and then squish that into the being of a single, wild person. You do not have to be intimately familiar with Paytas’ work to appreciate this. (I was not.) Also: p. cool that 32-year-olds can still hack it as influencers, eh?
“TikTok’s emo revival emerged from the creative chaos of quarantine,” by Ryan Broderick in Polygon. Speaking of 32-year-olds … holy Spill Canvas, am I here for this one. A bevy of emo/“punk” artists that xX_caitlincatastrophe_Xx loved in her receding youth are apparently now hitting it big again on TikTok. I’m baffled by the resurgence of the 2006ish-to-2012ish internet aesthetic — has the nostalgia cycle accelerated that much?? — but this is a jam if I’ve ever heard one.
“Voice Lessons,” by Alexis Soloski in The New York Times. Remember those board books you had as a kid, where you pushed the button to make the farm animal sound (or whatever else) at designated points? This is basically just like that, except with podcast voice. My one regret is that the Times’ own Michael Barbaro is somehow never mentioned. “This ….…. is The Daily.” Iconic!!
“The COVID Zoom Boom Is Reshaping Sign Language,” by Sarah Katz in Scientific American. Two great stories this week on the unintentional consequences of our long Zoom year: this, on the changes signers have made to adapt ASL to screens, and this from Inside Hook, on the (surprisingly well-documented) surge in “Zoom dysmorphia” surgeries.
“So Are French Bulldog Thieves Just Running Around Stealing Dogs?,” by Elena Debre in Slate. This interview with a “pet investigator” … oh my god. (Also, and I can’t stress this enough: Just get a damn rescue dog.)
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Postscripts
“Skunked” words. Foraging TikTok. Cuttlefish > marshmallow test. The fascinating, original fitness influencer (… circa 1897). How Dolly Parton became a secular saint. What happens to QAnon on March 5. I am actually, literally afraid I lost all my social skills to Covid.
“The computer made certain activities more efficient, but it also created more work to be done.” The Black historians of TikTok. A wild thread on Meghan Markle. In a jailhouse interview with CBS News, the QAnon shaman said that he “actually stopped somebody from stealing muffins.” The Tom Cruise deepfakes, meanwhile, are actually made by professionals, so worry less about that one. The new era of social isn’t feeds. God bless Gen Z for making undereye bags “cool.” Last but not least, I crowned a “best NFT explainer” last week; in fact, this one is way better!
That’s it for this week! Until the next one. Warmest virtual regards.
— Caitlin