Wait, the inventor of Bitcoin is my dad?

Brave new world we live in, guys. Doxing is the new reporting. Hyperlapse is the new timelapse. Cookie shots are the new cronuts. Polar bears are the new puppies! With all this frightening novelty going around, it makes sense that some among us might retreat into the past. On that note:
1. The monocle is in, and the Times is so incredibly on it. You could read the story in full or check out the monocle page on Amazon; not sure which is funnier, TBH.
2. One of the web’s biggest mysteries is solved. Maybe. Possibly. Depending whom you ask. Leah McGrath Goodwin claims she found the man behind Bitcoin -- and he’s a middle-aged savant who loves model trains. (Wait, the inventor of Bitcoin is my dad?!)
3. Are you sad the Oscars are over? Good/ridiculous news: Oscar 2015 speculation has ALREADY begun.

I would like to nominate this short film.
Postscripts: G-rated porn. Plant-powered radio. Silence as luxury. Pimp my rickshaw. Books make you a better bully and Gchat makes you a worse worker. What happens when Google doesn’t think you’re human. How to get Shaq to follow you on Twitter. What do New Yorkers complain about most? The Internet, of course.
Until tomorrow,@caitlindewey
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