What fresh hell is this?

If you thought your mother was embarrassing on Facebook, please prepare for a whole new world of pain. According to a new report from Pew, the Very Olds are now getting ~in on the game.~ I consider myself very fortunate here: The computers in my grandmother's senior housing complex are bogged down with too much porn to be usable in any way. But the rest of y'all better watch out when the old people invade ...

1. How Internet outrage lives and dies: kinda like a disease, actually! In this (very long, far-ranging) piece, Scott Alexander likens Internet anger to toxoplasma, a parasite that lives in cat poop. Among other things.

2. Online dating is turning us into Tamagotchis. Much like the digital pets of yore, our online beaus are abstract, removed and demanding -- a "kind of technosocial training wheel for future socialization."

3. What happens to viral people once their Internet infamy ends. Three women, three humiliations -- three eventual happy endings. This is a good note to end the week on, I think!

Sometimes we throw all of Dory's toys at her just to see what she'll do. (Not much.)

Postscripts: Manslamming. Silver linings. Bullshit tech products for 2015. What fresh hell is this food-less "virtual reality" and how do these YouTube stars make so much money? How computer science helps art historians. How VHS tapes saved the early web. A heartening dispatch from the food world: Dessert is not actually dead. (Amen!)

Have a nice weekend! Until Monday,
@caitlindewey

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